Recently I read with some interest an article about a concern in Colorado that has plans to convert manure from cattle into methane gas to power a cheese factory and several other businesses. I think it would be a splendid idea, but why stop there? Why not proceed to Washington, bottle all the bull crap produced there, and we would have enough energy to power the country?
As for me, I've seen enough cow manure down on the farm while growing up that I don't even want to hear about it. I spent half of my childhood mucking out the barn and then spreading it on the fields come spring. If cow manure could produce as much gas as indicated, we could heat every home in America and sell the surplus to the Arabs.
Maybe every home could have a cow or two, along with a means to capture the gas, and we could then kiss the propane dealer goodbye. There would be no need for natural gas pipelines. After all, what is more natural than that which comes from the stomach of a cow? It is said that 18 percent of greenhouse gasses in this country come from the flatulence of cattle, and that's a whole lot of potential energy.
We may be onto something here. After all, there must be other animals whose dung produces gas, and if we were to tap into this endless supply of natural fuel, we would never again have to be concerned about an energy shortage. It is amazing that no one has ever thought about this before! Perhaps they have but, lacking the facilities to extract the gas from
Cattle have played an important role in advancing the cause of civilization. Besides producing a wholesome, healthy and beneficial beverage that has served mankind for centuries, cattle have been used for their hides, meat and as draft animals for their amazing strength. Oxen played a tremendous part in the settlement of the American West, and many early pioneer families may not have survived without the services of this versatile animal.
And now another use has been found for this amazing creature. But in India, cattle are considered sacred animals and it is forbidden to slay them or to eat beef. The McDonald's restaurants in India serve only burgers made from vegetables or meat from other animals. A Big Mac spinach burger sound delicious.
There are today in the United States approximately 33 million beef cattle and that, my friend, is enough to produce a prodigious supply of manure with resulting amounts of gas.
The dairy farmers of this country who are struggling to make a living through the sale of milk and milk products may be missing out on a great opportunity here. A hundred pounds of manure might be more valuable than a gallon of milk, with far less labor involved. They could conceivably use both products, but this might be called double dipping. Cattle could become energy-producing machines that require little or no maintenance without adding any radiation or smokestack emissions to the atmosphere.
But don't expect this newfound energy to come cheap. If this thing works out, the first thing you know, some huge corporation will corner the dung market, and we will still be paying through the nose to heat our homes. While the hapless and unknowing bovines that lay the golden eggs go on blissfully gorging themselves, we may soon be the beneficiaries of the end result.
Everything on earth has some useful purpose, and that's no bull!
Joe Bushika, of Stamford, Vt., has been known to sling the bull from time to time.
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