Life is complicated. Short Answers isn't.
WISHFUL DREAMING
Dear Short Answers:
Is there any way to sleep with my co-worker without losing my boyfriend in the process?
-- Carole
Dear Carole:
We don't know of an answer to your question that is not hurtful or self-destructive, but if you figure it out, please let us know!
EXTENUATING CIRCUMSTANCES
Dear Short Answers:
It was camp visiting weekend and so we hosted two sets of parents at our country house. We went a day early, cleaned, shopped, made dinner, chilled the wine and spent the day running around, set for a perfect dinner, great wines and company. When they arrived (21 2 hours late) the husband of couple No. 2 lit into the wife of couple No. 1 and completely ruined the evening and the weekend. It's a year later and we've avoided them and their requests for dinners, travel, get-togethers, etc. thus far. But, as camp approaches, should we let bygones be bygones, or spare ourselves the drama?
-- Harried Hosts
Dear Harried:
Parents Weekend is one of the most stressful events known to man. Very nearly any kind of aberrant behavior can be excused. However, there's no reason to allow yourselves to be the doormat either. Scale back. This time, invite them to stop by for a drink and don't be horrified if someone gets drunk.
SURFEIT OF RICHES
Dear Short Answers:
I have a
-- 2ManyDudes
Dear 2ManyDudes:
Just tell him straight -- you are fully committed. The end.
REALITY BITES
Dear Short Answers:
I'm gay and about three weeks ago, my boyfriend of over two years broke up with me. We've been long-distance boyfriends since 2010. This summer, I took him with me to Europe for six weeks. We had a great time, got in no fights on the trip and had a blast. We were best friends and lovers. Now on opposite coasts, he says he can't feel connected with me at a distance. I do so much to keep our connection going -- send him daily news bits, send him postcards, small gifts, planned special/surprise vacations for when we're together. He's not 100 percent comfortable with his sexuality; he's not even 60 percent comfortable with his sexuality. Months of hearing that he's going to change and broken promises from him have led to a very painful break up. I should hate him and part of me does, but more so, I miss him. I miss the person who I thought I knew for so long. I'm a strong and honest person, but I feel so betrayed by him. I want answers. My heart hurts so badly. He's just gone. What do I do?
-- Heartbroken
Dear Heartbroken:
You get on with your life and find someone who is more certain. You have answers -- just not the ones you want. Sorry.
MAYBE IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU
Dear Short Answers:
If someone you know casually (a friend) doesn't return your phone call (twice), what do you do?
-- Waiting
Dear Waiting:
Try one more time -- or better yet, text.
Send your questions anonymously on our website (www.shortanswers.net) or email them to thetranscript@shortanswers.net. Jeff Johnson has worked as a psychologist for New York State, New York City and the federal government as well as teaching at the graduate level. He is a Williams College alumnus and lives in Pownal, Vt. Paula Forman has worked as a professional "trend spotter" with high-profile clients such as Procter & Gamble. More recently, she taught sociology in the New York City university system. She lives and writes in Hudson, N.Y.
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